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LIFE by Dr. Pat

Six ways to soften the landing when a cycle fails

Put a soft cushion down before the fall, so it hurts a little less

Dr. Patsama VichinsartvichaiMClinEmbryol, EFOG-EBCOG, EFRM-ESHRE/EBCOG.

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Many of my patients, I am sure, have been through the disappointment of a cycle that did not end in pregnancy many times over. Sometimes you are hoping through the treatment and hoping through your own natural cycle at the same time — and just the arrival of your period is enough to leave you sitting there in tears, isn’t it? Sorrow and disappointment simply come with fertility treatment.

A natural cycle has roughly a 20% chance of success — which means an 80% chance of disappointment, larger than the chance of success. IUI normally succeeds about 10% of the time, so the chance of disappointment is 90%. IVF, even with the embryos chromosome-tested, succeeds about 40-50% of the time — a 50-60% chance of disappointment. A coin has two faces, and so does treatment.

So for those of us going through fertility treatment, we need to lay a soft cushion down to catch us when we fall, so that it hurts a little less. Today I have six ways of preparing that cushion to suggest to you — do try putting them into practice.

  1. Time heals everything — We are human, for heaven’s sake. We are allowed to hurt, we know how to cry. Other people tell us it’s all right — but hey, I’m the one going through it. Unless they are us, they don’t really understand what it is like.
  2. It’s okay to cry — Acknowledge your own grief, so that you can get on with things sooner.
  3. Ask for help — Talking to a mental-health professional, a psychologist for instance, may help us turn the way we look at our grief into good energy.
  4. Ask until it’s clear, test thoroughly, and you can still change clinic — Whatever you are unsure about in the treatment, ask until it is settled. If you have read up and think something ought to be tested, raise it with the doctor looking after you. And if you are still not happy, you can try moving to another clinic.
  5. Don’t forget the person beside you
  6. Things that help you relax — There are plenty of other ways as well — meditation, yoga and so on — that help you relax.

With my best wishes — Dr. Patsama Vichinsartvichai

References

  • https://www.bambiweb.org/health/ivf-surviving-the-emotional-rollercoaster-after-a-failed-cycle/